#31 - Stop Self-Betrayal and Start Living Your Truth

If you’ve been feeling “off”… like something’s not quite right even though you’ve done all the right things, this one's for you. That tug in your chest, that ache in your gut? It’s not a crisis—it’s a call.

In this short but potent solo drop, I speak straight from the heart (literally from bed) to the midlife woman who’s been betraying herself one small compromise at a time—putting everyone else first, shrinking her voice, and wondering why the love and validation never feel quite enough.

This is your wake-up whisper—and your permission slip to stop shape-shifting for the world and start returning to yourself.

In This Episode, You’ll Hear:

✨ Why self-betrayal often looks like being “the nice one”
✨ The moment I stopped calling it a crisis and started calling it a midlife awakening
✨ A powerful story of one of my clients standing in her truth—and how the world shifted around her
✨ The real reason you feel unseen (and how to change that)
✨ What it feels like to be unshakably YOU—and how to get there

Reflection Questions:

1. Where in your life are you still shrinking or shape-shifting to be accepted?
2. What would it look like to stop betraying yourself and start choosing you, every damn day?
3. If your soul left you a voicemail today… what would she say?

If you're interested in working with me and my coaching services, please reach out. 

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Song: Reborn by Alexander Nakarada

Chapters

• 0:00 Midlife Butterfly Introduction
• 0:54 When Will You Stop Betraying Yourself?
• 3:31 Midlife Awakening Not Crisis
• 6:51 Client Success Story
• 11:03 Becoming Your Unshakable Self
• 14:34 Episode Closing and Call to Action

Transcript

Kena Siu: 0:02

Midlife butterfly, a woman in the sacred in between. She's not who she once was and not quite who she's becoming yet. She's unraveling, awakening, remembering. She's navigating life transitions, divorce, loss, reinvasion, moves, with a burning desire for freedom, joy and solid living. She feels the pull to rise to, to fly. She is no longer afraid of her own wings.

Kena Siu: 0:37

Hey, beauty Kena here, welcome back to the Midlife Butterfly, this time recording from bed, because I just feel inspired at this very moment in the morning. So here we go. My question to you is when are you going to stop betraying yourself? Yes, it's amazing how us like women mainly we betray ourselves by prioritizing others, you know, by being the last in the list by others. You know, by being the last in the list, by shifting, so we can fit in, so we can be loved, we can avoid rejection and abandonment. And what happens? By doing all that, you are not living in integrity. If you feel off, that means that there is a misalignment over there, because you are not being the true you. You are there for others but not for yourself. And then you wonder why Other people, according to your perception, are not loving you or accepting you or listening to you. You're not being seen and heard. They are just reflecting back to you what you are not doing to yourself. If you are always pleasing others, if you are always looking for validation, it means that you are not being you. That's not your true self, so that's self-betrayal. So what do you have to do here? What do you get to do? Actually, that's the excitement. What do you have to do here? What do you get to do? Actually? That's the excitement.

Kena Siu: 3:27

It's about noticing who you are, not because you are being now someone that you are not really. That's what you might believe, that you are in a midlife crisis, when the truth is you are in a midlife awakening. Your soul is calling you back home and that's why the ick and the offness and the probably shower of emotions that you might get sometimes, because your soul, through your body, is calling you out, is telling you come on, it's time for you to bring your truth, to speak your truth, to be you, to be you, and if you keep betraying yourself, you're never going to be you. You gotta let go of all those behaviors and patterns and conditioning that you have been under, telling you who you're supposed to be, plus the checklist, the status quo. Aren't you fucking fed up of that? I am. I'm so fucking fed up of that, and the truth is you are the one in charge of shifting that you are. It's about you taking the decision to say, okay, this is it, this is it, and allow yourself to start receiving that information from your intuition, from God, from your self, from your soul, whatever you want to call it, and now allow her to guide you. It might guide you to take a moment for yourself of stillness. It might guide you to rest. It might guide you to connect back to nature. It might guide you to set a boundary. It might guide you to hire a coach or a mentor to speed up the process, because this takes time. Stop being yourself, the self that is actually eking now, the one that is in crisis.

Kena Siu: 6:31

Between quotes, there are ways, by getting help from other people, to get to know yourself better, and that's what I love doing with my clients, because it's so exciting. Like this week I had a conversation with one of my clients and she was telling me because she went on vacation with other families they rented an Airbnb and she was so nervous because she's like I know I have changed and I'm afraid that I'm gonna keep, you know, like better, say, like going backwards by being with these people and trying to please them and going back to my behaviors. And she was so surprised and I could see her on her face when we were talking, like that pride, you know, and excitement, and she said we have such a great vacation. She said the first couple of days was a bit hard because they were kind of like pulling me back, but I just stood on my truth. She was saying what she needed and for her children and within a few days I mean since they noticed that she shifted to speak her truth and to be more her person for herself and for her children the other people stepped back and started respecting that and understanding and seeing that she was different this time. And just by her because again, you are the creator of your own reality by her standing into her truth and saying, okay, this is what I want, this is what is needed for my family at this moment and I'm going to follow what is good for me and for us. And she had such a beautiful vacation. She was like we have such a great time. I cannot believe it. And that's the thing. She's been coming back home to herself by releasing the people ple her, by stepping into her truth, what is for her, good? You know her values, what is important for her and her principles and in who she truly is. So by stopping that self-betrayal and stepping into her truth and speaking it up and embodying it, that's how she's creating a better reality in her life. Isn't it cool? Oh my gosh. She was telling me I was just like I am now, like so excited. I felt so happy and proud of herself because she's doing it.

Kena Siu: 9:59

It is possible to be you and, at one point, stand strong to who you truly are, that, no matter what other people might think, they're going to feel it because you are from a place of alignment and harmony and love for yourself, that you're fucking unshakable. That's the truth. Of course, it gets wobbly sometimes. Yes, I mean Accept, you're humanist, yeah, but it's much harder that somebody comes and step on you. It's much harder that you're going to self-betray because you know more and more who you are and what you are standing for. That oof, that self-betrayal, becomes confidence, becomes resilience I don't know, I just lost the words but it becomes. It becomes a true you, tall and proud, in this beautiful gown and feeling that you know freshness and the wind, and feeling the sun over your skin and saying, yes, this is me, this is me, and I get to keep practicing. With every experience, with every interaction, with every connection that I have, I get to keep practicing to come back home to myself. I'm just feeling the chills of that distral station. Are you.

Kena Siu: 12:52

If you are not, pause this and listen to it again. Imagine how will you feel once you awake to your true self and start embodying and being her. It is right there. She is right there waiting for you to pick up the call. She is there. Are you ready to pick up? And with this I'm leaving you this juicy short episode. If you're interested in working with me and my coaching services, please reach out. All the information is in the show notes. Wishing you a lot of love from a beautiful place that I'm going to be at the time this episode comes out and I'll be in my moon dance retreat for the third year in a row, dancing for the moon with a beautiful group of people to bring more peace and love to this beautiful humanness and world. That is very, very needed. Much love to you and take care.

Kena Siu: 14:34

Thank you for tuning into Midlife Butterfly. If this episode lit a spark in you, hit that subscribe or follow button on Apple Podcasts, spotify or wherever you love to listen, so you'll never miss the magic. If you're feeling generous, drop a review on Apple Podcasts. It helps this empowering content reach more souls ready to transform their lives. And don't forget to take a photo of you while listening and share it on your socials. You can tag me at KenSU so I can celebrate you and your expansion. Until next time, keep spreading those wings and living in joy, growth and pleasure.