#56 - The Fertile Void: When Life Slows You Down on Purpose

What if the void you feel it’s guiding you to something great? 

If you’re in a season where you’re not moving forward, but you’re not moving backward either… this episode is for you.

In this deeply grounding conversation, Kena speaks to the fertile void — that uncomfortable, quiet, in-between space so many women in midlife try to rush through or fix. The pause after a divorce. The stillness after a big move. The winter that follows an awakening.

Through lived experience, embodied wisdom, and soulful truth, Kena reframes stagnation as gestation. This isn’t a time for forcing clarity or chasing answers — it’s an invitation to slow down on purpose, listen inward, and consciously choose what you’re planting next.

You’ll explore how productivity culture disconnects you from your body, why rushing leads to building someone else’s dream, and how presence, rest, and self-trust become radical acts of empowerment in midlife.

By the end of this episode, you’ll feel permission to pause, clarity about your season, and a deeper trust in your timing — knowing that something meaningful is already forming beneath the surface.

✨ In This Episode You’ll Learn

• Why the fertile void is not stagnation but a powerful gestation phase
• How to stop forcing clarity and start listening to your body
• What happens when you rush decisions that don’t belong to you
• The truth about rest, embodiment, and midlife empowerment
• How to plant intentions rooted in soul — not conditioning

🦋 Reflection Questions

1. Where in my life am I rushing for answers instead of allowing myself to listen?
2. What kind of life am I unconsciously planting when I ignore my body’s timing?
3. What would change if I trusted this season as preparation, not delay?

If you’ve been feeling disconnected… even after doing the inner work—this is your invitation.
Join me live on April 1 & 8 for a guided Neuroepigenetic Breathing experience to reconnect with your body and come back to yourself.

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HOME is my monthly membership for midlife women who are already doing the inner work and are ready to embody it.

Through nervous system regulation, Neuroepigenetic Breathing, and grounded integration practices, you create safety in your body and expansion in your life.

This is where insight becomes lived experience.

Join the Waitlist: home.midlifebutterfly.ca

🦋 Work With Me
If this episode landed in your body and not just your mind,
you may be standing at a threshold.

I offer connection calls for women who feel ready to move, align, and embody the inner work they’re already doing.

This is an intimate conversation to feel into whether working together is a true yes.

If you’re done searching and ready to choose yourself more fully,
you’re invited to book a call through the link below.

Trust what brought you here.

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Transcript

Naming The Fertile Void

Kena Siu 0:24

If you're in a season where nothing feels clear, where you're not moving forward, but you're not moving backward either, this episode is for you. If you're feeling like suspended, questioning yourself, wondering if you're doing something wrong, or you're fearful of the unknown, today I want to talk about something I'm leaving right now: the 13th void. A season most of us rush through or try to fix instead of listening to. Are you with me? Welcome, beautiful soul. This is Midlife Butterfly, the space where you remember who you truly are beneath all the roles, responsibilities, and expectations. I'm your empowerment guide, Kena Siu. And I hold this space for women in midlife who are ready to rediscover themselves, reclaim their joy, and live fully aligned. If you're new here, welcome to our cocoon. You've just entered a place where choosing yourself isn't selfish, it's sacred. Okay, so as mentioned before, we're talking about the fertile void today. You might be wondering, what does this mean? Well, have you felt a void once in your life, or probably you are in it now? You know, that empty place that you kind of feel with then, and it makes you feel like suspicious and uncomfortable and frustrating because you might think that you are in a state of stagnation. But the thing is this when we are intentional with that void, we can make it fertile, and what I mean with this, it's being mindful of what do you want to grow in that space, which is the seed that you want to plant. It's like gestation space, you know, like a baby itself, because it's invisible, it's internal, and at the same time, it's deeply alive. And when you put a seed of something that you really want to create, in this case, we're in winter, it's the beginning of the year. What is it that you want to plant in this fertile void? Because with that intention, it means that you are setting the energy in there. You are going to then integrate those insights there, you're planting there. So, whatever it is that it wants to emerge, it takes that form of what you want to create. Because the truth is, this phase it's it's a phase to slow down on purpose, and I think you've seen it in nature. We see it in every season, and that's what I mentioned winter before. It slows down on purpose because it's a way to come to a stillness, to rest, to recalibrate. It's like nature itself, right? But it's also at the same time this space in between of what is next, but you don't know what is it, but at the same time, my best recommendation is don't push it. Don't push it. Take the time to be quiet, to listen. So that seed that you are planting in this fertile void, it is something that you really desire. It is something that comes from within, from your soul, from your heart, and it's not coming from some checklist, from some status quo, or for whatever else, it's in the collective that is telling you that you're supposed to be or have. And that's the issue that our culture, we are allergic to pauses. We're supposed to be productive all the time, but the truth is that's bullshit. Just by seeing winter now, it's a time to pause, it's a time to go within. Animals do it, and we humans were also animals. We are, but we want to rush it, and the problem with that is then your nervous system must be all frustrated or struggling, and it is because again, we have been conditioned to be productive, we're supposed to show our worth in the outputs and outcomes that we are having. And if we feel like if we don't do something, or we are not doing something, or we're gonna be left behind. But then if we rush it, you might feel that you're choosing wrong. Or on the other side, you might be fearful of the unknown. When in reality, everything you have experienced in life has been unknown at one moment, and yeah, I mean, slowing down, it feels uncomfortable. It it is, it is, but what about if you allow, if you allow your body, even if it's for the first time in your freaking life, to rest. What about if your mind is just wants answer and you said, can you just stay quiet? Just for a moment? I don't need answers. I gotta rest. I want to give space to my soul and my heart to tell me what to actually what is gonna be the seed here that I want to plant. But the problem with that is that then we feel guilt and we feel anxiety, and we feel that pressure to make you know decisions, and again, we are so conditioned to the doing and the doing instead of the being when we force movement here in this phase is when we often plant seeds that don't belong to us. If you rush it, you might grow something that you didn't really want. Does this sound familiar? How was your last year? What did you rush to do and to create not based in what your soul was telling you that at the end you didn't feel fulfilled, you didn't feel whole, and you probably achieved the goal or goals of someone else instead of yours. So, yeah, this is a freaking wake-up call for you. It is, it is because you are the creator of your own reality, and the more you can take the time, the space for quietness, for stillness to check in within, that fertile void is gonna flourish so beautifully that you're gonna feel so fucking proud of it. That even when some flowers might not be exactly the ones that you see, you're gonna be proud of them. And you're gonna love them and you're gonna honor them and respect them. I don't know if you have noticed in case you you follow me on social media, but I haven't been that active since November. I really wanted to take that pause. I noticed my body needed it, and then we enter winter, and it's like, yeah, no, I feel that I gotta take space for me and allow myself to see what is it that the seeds that I'm planting at this moment are going to flourish. And to tell you the truth, it's the first time, it's the first time in my life that I'm not brushing. I am enjoying the process so much. Like, really, like saying, okay, show me the magic. I'm here for the magic. I don't know. I know that whatever it is that is coming is gonna be great. Why? Because I'm taking the time to honor it, to respect their own timing. I don't want to rush it. Really letting things grow. I'm nurturing that soil of this void. It's been such a beautiful process because the waiting between quotes, it has been about enjoying life. The time with my dear ones, the times when I'm doing my practices, the time where I have beautiful conversations with my friends, the times that I'm actually studying, and I feel like I'm being more present, being more aware, and it's a different way of living, and I'm enjoying it so much. Because even though sometimes my mind is kind of wants the answers, wants to push, it's my mind now, because my body is like, Well, we are cool, my nervous system is calm. So it's the mind that is trying to play with me and saying, Hey, supposed to rush, you're supposed to be doing something else. But now in this state where I am, with such a connection with my body that I'm the one I'm listening to it. This kind of embodiment that I have achieved in the last six, seven months after I've been doing neuroepigenetic breathing is the best gift I have ever given to myself, and the best gift I have ever received. It's so beautiful, it's just so beautiful. Okay, you might be wondering: so, how do I put this fertile void into a practical thing? Okay, so the first thing, sure, is your mind, right? Because is that inner critic always pushing? And probably a question that keeps happening in there is like, what should I do? What should I do? Okay, what about shifting that question for what do I want to do right now that feels good? That's it. What do you want to do right now that feels good? Okay. Second practice rest, nourishment, and presence. I didn't mention all of this before, and the thing is this is about practice. It's really about consuming less for taking more quiet time and stillness. Because those seeds, when they are going to sprout, I mean, they're gonna come through you. The universe is gonna talk through you and it's gonna be showing you inspired action. But you gotta be open, you gotta be quiet so you can receive those messages. Okay, and then the other practice that you can do, it's about checking out with your energy. So when you are doing something that is between quote not productive, which is all good not being productive, it feels so fucking good. It is about asking, is this expanding or joining me? Okay, because if it's expanding you, if you're feeling that openness and that expansion in your heart, in your body, it's like fucking welcome it. That's what you want, that's how you nurture actually that soil. But if it's draining you, well, you don't want any weed in there in your soil, right? So stay away from it. Do something different that is gonna make you feel good, okay? Because this void it doesn't respond to force, or it does, but you're gonna see the consequences, so you better be patient and respond with your presence because through that presence is how you're going to start experiencing synchronicities, listening to you know, to the messages that are downloading, or getting signs here and there that are gonna give you those pieces of the puzzle of that void that you are in right now. Before I close, I want to to name this. The seed has been planted from my side, it's been planted quietly and very intentionally. What is forming now, it's it's not about doing more. I mean, it's it's time to balance our feminine and masculine energies and understanding that balance that is not always about the doing, it's also about the being. It's about coming home to yourself in a deeper and more embodied way. I'm not ready to share it all of it yet. So I just want you to stay tuned, to stay present in the season that you are in. And if something in you is longing to come home, stay tuned. Stay tuned. And just to have you know, a closing reflection in here is like if you are in winter right now, if you are feeling that you know, that you are behind, no, no, no. Remember that you are preparing. Remember to take that time of stillness and quietness to plant the seeds that you want to flourish this year. Okay, you are the co-creator. You are, it's in your hands. It's in your hands. And if this episode landed in your body and not just your mind, I'd love to hear from you. You can send me a message or reply to my newsletter if you are in it, and tell me well, where you are in this cycle of life. Trust the season that you are in, and I hope to see you very soon. Take care. Thank you for tuning in to Midlife Butterfly. I hope this episode empowers you in some way. Share the love by hitting follow whatever you're listening to and leave a review if you feel inspired. I also love to connect with you. Come say hi on Instagram at Midlife Butterfly. I love to know you. Until next time, keep spreading those wings and live enjoying growth and pleasure.